When Resolutions Fail

What do you do when your resolutions fail? If resolutions are signifiers of progress and you are standing still, or worse going backwards, how do you stop the trajectory and move in the right direction? How do you get up daily and continue to fight for your resolutions when you feel defeated?

This is where I am and I can assure you I don't have the answers to these questions. My resolutions were mostly ongoing and things I hoped to realize this year. Then last week everything came crashing down around me and when Friday came I was ready to throw in the towel. I went to bed feeling absolutely defeated. I knew I wasn't, it was just one of those life moments when you are temporarily knocked down, but still it is difficult to rise up to fight when you already feel down for the count. In these moments I am reminded of advice given to me by a friend, who was literally fighting for his life. I asked him how he managed to keep his spirits up and to keep fighting when his body was so sick and it seemed easier to give up. He told me that you don't just get to give up and that even when you don't want to that you have to keep trying. In essence, without taking extreme measures like suicide, you have no other option except to get up everyday. You have the choice to be miserable about it or to see the silver lining, but you don't get to choose to give up.

In this moment, I have no choice except to wake up daily, my beating heart essentially decides that one, but from there I am free to choose how I am going to face my failure in my resolutions. Do I decide these are not the resolutions for me or do I decide they are worth for fighting for? The answer to these questions varies on the person and the resolutions they have. For me, my choice is the later, to keep fighting for the goals I have set for myself, but I am realizing that I need to change my approach. For some resolutions, the means to obtain them is outside of my control and I need to change my outlook on the resolutions and my means to fight for their realization. You can hit your head on a wall everyday for the rest of your life, but it isn't going to get you any closer to your goals.

I don't have answers to my questions, but I know I need to keep my head up and do my best to keep fighting for my resolutions. I need to recognize my limitations and work towards making progress on realistic goals. One example of this is I am trying to get in the habit of working out regularly and overall live a healthier lifestyle. I find working out regularly a difficult task because usually I am tired and I have little motivation to do much at the end of the day. This last week I was able to work out twice and next week I will try to work out at least three times. Sometimes you need to be realistic and make goals that are achievable. Progress on little goals is a way to build up momentum and keep making progress on larger goals. 

It is the second week of January, how are your resolutions going? 

Resolutions: Planning To Keep

Yesterday I mentioned that resolutions are often not kept. Resolutions are forgotten or fail because we don't plan for them to succeed or we make them to vague to start. We can't simply resolve to live healthier lives or to succeed in our careers. If we want success then we need to create an action plan with achievable goals. Our action plan has to be more than get a promotion at work and should be comprised of real steps we can take towards that resolution. Real steps might be working later, taking on a new project, or asking for advice from a senior employee. These are steps we can realistically take to achieve our resolution of succeeding further in our career. The same is true for other resolutions like living healthier or learning a new skill. The first step to success is creating an action plan.

Nehemiah, a governor of Persian Judea, had a resolution to rebuild Jerusalem after it was destroyed by enemies. Nehemiah did not live in Jerusalem, but when he heard about the devastation, he was resolved to fix it. Nehemiah started the path to success by creating an action plan. The book of Nehemiah tells us that Nehemiah started his action plan by praying to God. When he knew he had God's blessing, he created a plan to succeed. He prayed continuously throughout the execution of his plan and spent time thinking about the logistics of what needed to happen in order for him to be successful. A certain amount of his plan was impossible in the sense that he would be unable to do it alone and needed God's blessing to influence the hearts of men. Nehemiah proved that it is ok to have an action plan with steps that we can't complete on our own, but that we need to have steps we can do too. The purpose of an action plan is to take real steps to achieve our goals and allow God to do what we can't. 

Financial Goal Planning Page

Some of my resolutions this year are financial goals that I would like to achieve in 2017. I am utilizing a bullet journal notebook in order to document and plan for the success of these goals. This notebook is my action plan. In it I can write down steps I need to take to succeed, document my progress, and know where I can't go any further on my own and where I need to faithfully turn it over to God. These financial goals are ongoing for 2017 and if I don't complete each step then I am not likely to have the success at the end of the year, but there is also room for miracles. I know there will be times when success will seem impossible, but I also know in those times God will provide for me when there didn't seem to be a way. I know this because God always provides for His children. 

Weekly Layout

Another resolution is just to be able to get more done and to have success in other areas of my life. Again, I am using that notebook to schedule in tasks and realistic steps I can take throughout the year to be more successful. I know that planning is not for everyone, but if you want to see success in your resolutions then I encourage you to create an action plan, document your success, and commit the rest to God. 

If you would like to see more of my bullet journal, or are interested in how I use it to complete resolutions, leave a comment below and I will include it in future posts. 

Resolutions

Happy New Year!

Today is the first day of 2017 and there is the hope, or rather the promise, that the new year has mercies anew. Last year may have been a rough year, a year you didn't think you would survive, but here you are in another year and with you is the potential to make this year better. Yes, there will always be circumstances outside of our control that can drastically shape our year, but there are also circumstances within our control that can effect our year as well. Typically, today is the day that we reflect on 2016 and make resolutions for 2017, but how many of those resolutions end up accomplished? I believe resolutions have a tendency to fail because they are just good ideas for our lives, rather than will or a plan to succeed. I can have a resolution to lose weight or get into better shape, but that isn't a plan and that resolution isn't motivation on a day when I am tired or not feeling well. The point isn't to bash resolutions, because they are a good place to start, but to begin to think beyond them and begin to achieve lasting results. 

This year I thought it would be interesting and maybe even more motivating if I let someone else pick one of my resolutions for 2017. Who knows you the best? Go to that person and ask them what resolution they think you should make for 2017. This isn't for the faint of heart. Many times people think things about us that we didn't know or thought were hidden features of ourselves. In order for this to work the person needs to be able to be honest with you and that isn't going to be easy. Maybe you are a shy person and your spouse has noticed that your shy attitude has held you back at work and prevented you from achieving what you have been working for your entire career. Your spouse might give you the resolution to talk to more people at work and to share your ideas at meetings. This isn't going to transform you overnight, but you will be reminded that you need to try because your spouse is rooting for you and this is their success too. Or maybe you have a tendency to turn down new experiences and your friend might give you the resolution to try at least one new thing this year. You would then have someone willing to try new things with and 2017 would be a year with new experiences and new memories. I understand that asking someone else for your resolution this year is scary and maybe this is too much for you this year, but I have a few ideas of how to begin to think beyond your resolutions that might be equally effective in allowing you to achieve success.

Resolution #1: Rest and Recharge

Mark 3:7 says, "Jesus withdrew with His disciples to the seas." Jesus, the perfect son of God, needed time to withdraw from society, rest, and recharge. He encouraged His disciples to do the same. The world frowns upon the idea of rest and gives the impression that human beings should be more like robots that work constantly, but even robots need to be recharged. Our electronic devices can only run so long before they have to be plugged in to recharge and other devices require battery changes. There isn't a single person or object in the world that can run continuously without being connected to a power source at some point. This should be a point of comfort for you; it is ok to rest and recharge. This year take time to withdraw, to rest, and to recharge. Draw upon the greatest power source, our Lord and Savior, and move forward into 2017 full of power. 

Resolution action plan: take a trip to the beach, go for a walk in the park, spend a day at home resting

Resolution #2: Your Body The Temple

1 Corinthians 6:19 says, "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own." I believe this passage from 1 Corinthians is often misused and used to condemn individuals who are not fit, but a fit body is not an indication it is a temple of the Holy Spirit. Many people, regardless of their fitness level, do not love or care for their bodies. Their bodies bring them shame and self-loathing, but the Bible says that we should think of our bodies as temples. We should love our bodies and take care of their well-being. Would we allow filth to pollute our church? Then in a similar way we should be mindful of what we allow to enter our body. This is more than about food or fitness. The body can be polluted by more than what we eat. Jesus said that what we eat is expelled from us, but what is in our heart stays with us. Taking care of the body begins with loving the body and believing the body to be the temple of the Holy Spirit, whom we have received from God. 

Resolution action plan: eat healthier foods that give your body strength, increase your activity level and strengthen your heart, limit the amount of filth that you allow into your daily life, immerse yourself in Godliness

Resolution #3: Do Unto Others

Matthew 7:12 says, "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets." Matthew 7:12 is the Golden Rule for how we should deal with one another. If we want someone to be compassionate towards us when we make a mistake then we ought to be compassionate towards others when they make a mistake too. As much as we are able, we need to treat others with the love, compassion, and mercy that we would want others to give us if the positions were reversed. This is not always easy because there are some things that we wouldn't do and they become unforgivable in our eyes, but Jesus commanded us to love our enemies and to forgive as we would want to be forgiven. Perhaps we can't put ourselves directly in their shoes, but sin is sin in God's eyes and if we would want God to forgive us for our own sin then we need to forgive others of their sin. Treating others with love, compassion, and mercy can be difficult when we think of them in their differences, but Jesus died for all of us and therefore they are God's children with us. No one is apart, but rather we are one in the kingdom of God. 

Resolution action plan: think of others as you would yourself, be kind to one another, forgive easily, show compassion, be merciful

These are just a few Biblical resolutions to start off your new year and I hope that you find the action plans for each helpful in achieving success this year. What are your resolutions for 2017? Do you have any tips for achieving success in resolutions? Leave a comment below and let me know.