Wednesday, January 11, 2017

When Resolutions Fail

What do you do when your resolutions fail? If resolutions are signifiers of progress and you are standing still, or worse going backwards, how do you stop the trajectory and move in the right direction? How do you get up daily and continue to fight for your resolutions when you feel defeated?

This is where I am and I can assure you I don't have the answers to these questions. My resolutions were mostly ongoing and things I hoped to realize this year. Then last week everything came crashing down around me and when Friday came I was ready to throw in the towel. I went to bed feeling absolutely defeated. I knew I wasn't, it was just one of those life moments when you are temporarily knocked down, but still it is difficult to rise up to fight when you already feel down for the count. In these moments I am reminded of advice given to me by a friend, who was literally fighting for his life. I asked him how he managed to keep his spirits up and to keep fighting when his body was so sick and it seemed easier to give up. He told me that you don't just get to give up and that even when you don't want to that you have to keep trying. In essence, without taking extreme measures like suicide, you have no other option except to get up everyday. You have the choice to be miserable about it or to see the silver lining, but you don't get to choose to give up.

In this moment, I have no choice except to wake up daily, my beating heart essentially decides that one, but from there I am free to choose how I am going to face my failure in my resolutions. Do I decide these are not the resolutions for me or do I decide they are worth for fighting for? The answer to these questions varies on the person and the resolutions they have. For me, my choice is the later, to keep fighting for the goals I have set for myself, but I am realizing that I need to change my approach. For some resolutions, the means to obtain them is outside of my control and I need to change my outlook on the resolutions and my means to fight for their realization. You can hit your head on a wall everyday for the rest of your life, but it isn't going to get you any closer to your goals.

I don't have answers to my questions, but I know I need to keep my head up and do my best to keep fighting for my resolutions. I need to recognize my limitations and work towards making progress on realistic goals. One example of this is I am trying to get in the habit of working out regularly and overall live a healthier lifestyle. I find working out regularly a difficult task because usually I am tired and I have little motivation to do much at the end of the day. This last week I was able to work out twice and next week I will try to work out at least three times. Sometimes you need to be realistic and make goals that are achievable. Progress on little goals is a way to build up momentum and keep making progress on larger goals. 

It is the second week of January, how are your resolutions going? 

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