Unconditional Love

A few days ago I was eating dinner with a friend and he said, "Did you know research has now shown love is conditional?" His question threw me off guard, rendering me temporarily speechless, because I believe true love is unconditional and reflect God's love for us. Today, his comment came to me again and I thought, "No, love is not conditional, but unconditional. Love is a choice." Love is very much a choice we make everyday. Yes, the initial stirrings of love are involuntary, but what remains after time and struggle is a choice. Every day you wake up and decide through your words and your actions that you will love that person. 

Back in September, I knew the one I loved was going to have a difficult weekend and I chose each moment to love him, to not be quick to anger, and to show him he was valued in my life. I will freely admit that weekend was not easy. There were a lot of thing that upset me and caused me pain, things that I could have justifiably been upset about, but I endured. At the end of the weekend he felt valued and I survived putting his needs first. I know I am not perfect and at times my love will fall short, but I also know each day it is a choice. There was a time when that weekend would not have been possible, when I would have felt the need to express that I was upset, and to demand my own way. Then I came across the Love Dare and decided to give it a try. I really enjoy reading the Love Dare as it takes you to the place where unconditional love is not only possible, but a desire in your heart through 40 dares over 40 days. Reading the Love Dare was eye opening and I have read it 4 times over the last 3 years. 

Each time I read through the book, completing the dares, I feel as if I learn something new and am able to recognize the growth in my life. Right now I am in this place where I feel my unconditional love is being tested and I am struggling to be happy for him when what makes him happy is causing me pain. There are times when love makes sacrifices, but if the sacrifice is going to have to endure then I would like to make the best of it. I don't want to be upset or unhappy. I just want to love this person the way God loves me. Our struggle is valuable to our outcome and I take joy in the struggle that makes my love more like Jesus' love for me. It isn't going to be easy, but God is working it together for my good.