Focus

This evening I spent some time reflecting on my journey so far and was reminded over and over again of my need to let go. Even now I am holding onto expectations and desires for my life. I am clearly seeing a plan and keep finding myself disappointed when my plan doesn't happen. It doesn't help that I am looking ahead, knowing what I want or need, and not knowing if it will be answered. I want to know and yet I know I don't get to know.

Today I am trying to change my focus and do the things I can control. I am taking all of my plans, my hopes, and my dreams and letting go. I am relinquishing control over the things I never really had control of to begin with. God knows the desires of my heart and He also knows my needs. Letting go allows me to rejoice for what I have as I have it rather than being disappointed for what I don't have. This isn't going to be easy. We, as humans, need to have a sense of control or we begin to feel anxious and insecure in our surroundings. I am not giving up control, but choosing to focus on what I can control  instead.

I began this shift in focus today. I looked at my environment and I didn't like what I saw so I spent the afternoon cleaning and organizing. I rid myself of the things that were making me overwhelmed and that no longer served a purpose in my life. There is still more to do, but tonight I am satisfied with the progress made. I also have control over what I eat, my budget, and my physical health. The results I see are based on my actions, I have control, and I am not consumed in disappointment because expectations weren't met.

Finally, my focus is shifted to living out God's will rather than anticipating His plans. I am able to read the Bible, know how I am suppose to live, and I have control over my actions. I will take care of my part, living according to God's will, and allow God to take care of His part, working everything together for the good of those who Him. I am ready to relinquish my control over to God.