Hosea And Love's Faithfulness

I prayed about today. I asked for an indication of my hope, I desired to know if my hope was sound, but if what happened today is meant as an indication, then my hope is gone. It is over. The last few days, today included, have been hard on me and I have struggled to understand while sorting through the pieces of my broken heart. Honestly, I am still confused and if I gain understanding in one area, it falls apart in light of some other area. Tonight, not willing to feel this way anymore, I prayed a selfish prayer. I asked for my feelings towards the one I love to be removed from my heart. I added if he wasn't going to be a part of my life, but the sentiment was the same, I didn't want to feel this way anymore.

Then I began to read and I read about Hosea. For those who don't know, Hosea was a powerful man and God told him to marry a prostitute. Hosea and the prostitute, Gomer, had a life together, he loved her very much, but Gomer was unfaithful anyways. A time goes by and God tells Hosea to renew his love for Gomer. This time he had to purchase her from the slave's block. Now their story is meant as an example of God's own love for us, but the story was incorporated into a larger message about love being faithful.

I read this passage and felt God pointing out the words, "love is faithful even when love isn't returned." I had prayed my prayer, no longer wanting to be tied to this other person, and God showed me He had no intention of answering that prayer. The love I feel in my heart, though it gives me pain, is meant to stay. Love is faithful. Love loves even when love isn't returned. There were the words, written in black and white, that showed the sacrifice I was expected to make. The sacrifice being the continued feelings of heartache I will still have. 

I don't know the purpose of this, but I can't deny God wants me to keep loving. It kind of fits with this morning though, when I told the one I love that I loved him, knowing that he wouldn't respond or return the love in any way. Sometimes the words are more their benefit, even if you don't see the results, than for our own. I didn't need him to tell me he loved me, although it is always nice to hear I love you.